10. Even your mom won’t call me back.
9. My earwax has icicles.
8. Schoology froze.
7. Trinity students came to gloat.
6.5. People actually read Colin’s basketball email.
6.4. Public schools are closed for the rest of the year.
6. Even the local celebrity didn’t want to come to school.
5.5. Mr. Reynolds didn’t sleep outside.
5.4. Our luge team just quit.
5. Even Elsa is bothered by the cold (anyway).
4. Girls are breaking dress code… oh, wait…
3. My SUV actually has a purpose now.
2. The flame of learning has been extinguished.
1.3. Everything is chattering except my teeth.